There was so much more that I wanted to say about תַטָּאה chattah, but I there were so many distractions the other day when I was trying to write. I went back and read what I wrote on my last blog posting, and now that things have quieted down a bit, I want to share some more of what the Holy Ghost was showing me on this topic.
The goal that God sets before us is His Will, and He desires for us to obey His Will. When we disobey God we miss the mark – we fail to meet the goal that He set for us. The failure to meet His goal is not just found in our actions, the failure occurs much earlier than that. Before we get to the part of wrong actions we fail in the motives of our hearts. We first fail when we don’t DESIRE to obey His Will. The first goal He sets before us is the desire to be obedient. He has the desire for obedience in His outstretched hand.
This is what the Psalmist was saying when he said that God would give us the desires of our heart. Ps. 37:4 Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. For a long time, I thought this scripture meant the same thing as Mt. 21:22 And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive.
Maybe a lot of other people think that too, I don’t know. We know that God is our father and He desires to give us good things to us, His children (Mt 7:11). But personally I am humbled and amazed when I read Ps. 37:4 with the revelation that God will actually give me the key to obedience, which is the DESIRE to BE obedient, and if I receive this key, this gift, He will put HIS desires into my heart. Sin or righteousness begins with the heart. You can תַטָּאה chattah – miss the mark, sin or you can hit the mark – receive His desires into your heart. Allowing Him to give you a heart that pursues righteousness is an action of righteousness! That is hitting the mark.
Paul knew what it was like to miss the mark. I identify with Paul in regards to overcoming my past. When I say “overcoming my past” I mean really and truly receiving God’s forgiveness so that I can move on in my relationship with Him. I spent several years in condemnation over choices I had made. I really beat myself up over my mistakes. I believed that I should not have made those mistakes because I knew better. I wanted to go back to the time when I was on fire for the Lord, but I didn’t think I would ever be able to get that fire back because I had messed up too much. I couldn’t see the path back to where I had been – not even the first step. My earthly father kept counseling me and talking to me and encouraging me regarding letting go of all that condemnation. He kept telling me that I couldn’t go back. God didn’t WANT me to go back. He wanted me to go on. But I just didn’t get it for a long time. I was extremely angry and bitter with myself, which caused me to be bitter and angry with others. When I finally came to the breaking point – I broke. I got the key to church from my dad, and I went by myself and I just broke before Him. I repented for all my mistakes and choices. I ministered deliverance to myself because I had allowed a lot of spirits to have strongholds in my life, and operate in and through my life. I repented to allowing them in, rebuked them and told them to leave, renounced them, and asked the Lord to fill me the fruits of the spirit. When I got up off my face I was a different person. My dad was rightJ
…I never did get back to the place where I was in my relationship with Jesus….I went on. I know Him better and more intimately now than I did before. I still treasure the memories I have of that old relationship with Him, but I wouldn’t go back to it now even if I could. What we have now is so much better than what we had before.